Western toad painting by Carl Dennis Buell

Birding and other pleasures and aggravations, in Berkeley and beyond, by Ron Sullivan.

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January 1, 2010

Found Poetry

THE ADVENTURES of ONE HOUSEWIFE

One housewife prevents a small child
from crawling under her pedal-driven sewing machine
by using three sides of a large cardboard box
to partially enclose the machine while it is being used.

To simplify the task of lifting a meat loaf from the pan,
one housewife places a strip of waxed paper in the pan
so that both ends extend over the edges.

The annoyance of having her silk stockings dry
with streaks in them led
one housewife to hang them between damp towels.

One housewife adds flavoring extract to cake batter,
one drop at a time,
by pouring the extract in a tablespoon,
which has been drilled and bent to fit
over the edge of the mixing bowl.

Before slipping clean curtains
over flat metal rods
one housewife forces a table knife into the rod
to prevent tearing the hems.

One housewife prevents metal casters
on heavy kitchen furniture
from scratching the finish on linoleum
by merely wrapping several layers of adhesive tape
around the rollers.

From Home Kinks: Popular Mechanics Home-Owners’ Guide, 1945

Responses

1 | By: Sally Mack on January 2, 2010 at 07:21 AM

Sally Mack's Gravatar

Meatloaf:  at what point does the housewife place a strip of waxed paper in the pan?  If it’s before baking, doesn’t the waxed paper—well, “goo” comes to mind although I, personally, have never baked waxed paper.  Maye it can be baked?  It makes more sense if the housewife used aluminum foil (did it exist in 1945?) or even brown paper.

Those danged streaks in my silk stockings—thanks for the tip!

2 | By: Ron Sullivan on January 3, 2010 at 09:08 PM

Ron Sullivan's Gravatar

The paper goes under the meatloaf, with the ends sticking up and over the short sides. Yeah there’s a picture. I still don’t quite like the idea.

Yummmmmmy, baked wax paper!

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