January 1, 2010
Found Poetry
THE ADVENTURES of ONE HOUSEWIFE
One housewife prevents a small child
from crawling under her pedal-driven sewing machine
by using three sides of a large cardboard box
to partially enclose the machine while it is being used.
To simplify the task of lifting a meat loaf from the pan,
one housewife places a strip of waxed paper in the pan
so that both ends extend over the edges.
The annoyance of having her silk stockings dry
with streaks in them led
one housewife to hang them between damp towels.
One housewife adds flavoring extract to cake batter,
one drop at a time,
by pouring the extract in a tablespoon,
which has been drilled and bent to fit
over the edge of the mixing bowl.
Before slipping clean curtains
over flat metal rods
one housewife forces a table knife into the rod
to prevent tearing the hems.
One housewife prevents metal casters
on heavy kitchen furniture
from scratching the finish on linoleum
by merely wrapping several layers of adhesive tape
around the rollers.
From Home Kinks: Popular Mechanics Home-Owners’ Guide, 1945
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